We're DIFFERENT

Ok, it's been a while since I have given an update, mostly because there isn't much to write about. All of our paperwork (minus one reference letter, Jo has the flu :( ) is in. Our DOJ and local police clearances are in. At this point we only need our homestudy and FBI clearances back. Our final homestudy appointment is on Sunday. This week has been crazy, stressful, etc. as we are frantically trying to finish some lingering projects and be as prepared as possible for our home inspection. We are very excited and nervous about Sunday. We (including our social worker) are hoping to have our home study report completed, with FBI clearances, by the end of the month. We will keep our fingers crossed that the FBI has our timeline in mind (haha). I recently realized I never posted anything about our 2nd home study appointment, so here goes.

In this appointment we each had separate 1 and 1/2 hour interviews with the social worker. Both Brian and I were extremely surprised how the interviews went. For a good hour of the time we were answering questions and dishing about our families and childhood. Relatively little was about our future child or our relationship with one another. I guess they figure you will parent similarly to the way you were raised. The most interesting part of my conversation with our social worker, Lori, had to do with my age. She asked me what I thought of the home study process. I answered honestly and told her I was worried she would take one look at me and write me off as being too young. She said it wasn't her place to judge only report her observations. Lori said she found me to be very mature (yes, I know), articulate, etc. for my age and that thought never crossed her mind. She congratulated us for being so young yet having a seemingly very strong marriage of almost 4 years. She was definitely choosing her words carefully at this point and said "As a mother, I would have been very concerned that you were getting married right after your 20th birthday. I think you guys have a great relationship though, your situation is just so (long, weird pause) - different. To be so young and make the decision to get married is different than most people. Then to have children right now is very different from your peers who are probably finishing college and looking for the next step in life. What is even more different is that you don't have any known fertility problems, you want to adopt, and you want to do it first. I think what you guys are doing is great, but you are just so different than most people." I think our social worker is great and loved talking to her. I realized she was being careful, as to not offend me and it didn't. This conversation was followed by me explaining to her the audacity of strangers who think they are allowed to give their opinion on me being married and "looking like a baby" myself. I explained that this is definitely occurring a lot less as I have gotten older but expect it to start up again once we have our little boy!! I have already started mentally preparing to bite my tongue and smile at people who are SO out of line :).

The more I think about this conversation the more thrilled I am. As a Christian, what a wonderful compliment. We are in this world, but try not to be of it. We are DIFFERENT! It's always a little nerve-racking explaining to strangers (like our social worker), who might not understand our reasoning. We are adopting in answer God's call on our lives and in service to Him. In doing so we will be blessed by having the opportunity to be parents. It's been very exciting for me to hear that we are different. Whether people mean it as a compliment or a criticism, I can't help but be happy that we are making choices that are DIFFERENT - what a great testimony!!